or is the world moving just a little too fast these days?
Maybe it has something to do with Sarai turning one already. Maybe it has to do with the number of changes I've gone through within a relatively short period of time (became a minitry leader, married, finished grad school, prego, baby, and now a toddler). But whatever the cause, things seem to be happening a bit faster than I can keep up with.
I think of the phrase, "hold that thought." Seems like I can't hold onto any thought. Far too often, I'm downstairs, just about to leave when suddenly, I remember--I need to grab some diapers for the diaper bag! I race up the stairs, two at a time, and land at the top, slightly winded. I stand there at the top, and look around: our room, baby's room, office. "Now, what did I come up here for??"
There is definitely something wrong with that picture. I'm not even 30, and I'm having problems remembering something within a span of like, 30 seconds.
I am a product of the rapid-technology generation--those of us who barely remember the world without computers (started typing and working on Macs when I was only 9 years old). I grew up on Sesame Street on TV and Street Fighter on Super Nintendo. I remember the proliferation of the Information Superhighway; while I was in middle school, I created my first online social networking profile (remember blackplanet??). And a short few years later, I opened an email account that I still use today. I have been well-connected for a while now.
Yet, I'm beginning to feel a bit encumbered by the abundance of information to which we now have access. Call me crazy, but...I'm starting to miss the days of less information! Less news to consider, fewer points of view to navigate through, fewer distractions, fewer messages torpedoed my way!
Now, there are always emails to respond to, startling status updates, text messages galore. Family is a fragmented concept; friendships are virtual; and neighbor almost equates with phantom.
We can spend hours behind computer screens, focus intently on teeny text message apparatuses, and read news line by line without blinking an eye. Yet spending more than a moment in prayer has become laborious, seeing each others' hearts is like trying to see through a dark mosaic veil, and watching the sway of the trees is only a foreground for our incessant thoughts.
But like I said,
maybe
it's just
me.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Responses to Undesired Attention from Guys
Today, while at the mall with 2 friends: 25 and 26 years old, I was astonished. I had already sat down to eat when I saw a teenage boy (maybe 18/19) come up to the 26-year-old and try to get her #. She replied a simple, "not interested," to which he responded with a long wordplay about what he should call her, "not"? She could not get him to leave her alone until she walked away from him swiftly. Couldn't even enjoy her time with friends at the mall because of such an annoying intrusion.
It has always bothered me how we as young women are often approached by men (young and old) who are trying to "get at" us (or holla, mack, run game, spit, whatever you choose to call it). Then, if we are not interested, we have to be careful about how we respond to their unsolicited propositions or else we become a target.
Often, we want to be nice without just flat out saying "get out of my face." Simply saying you're not interested can result in him yelling about how you "think you too good" or calling you foul names. Offering a polite smile with a "no" can somehow translate to "yes, please keep following me." Ignoring him altogether can turn into a yelling fest you didn't ask for and don't deserve. And don't let him be with a group of his boys. Then, his poor ego is on the line. And so, then, is your safety (emotional or otherwise). I can honestly remember times as a teenager when I've given a guy a fake number just to get him to leave me alone. It's a terrible place to be in--at risk for violation, humiliation and degradation.
Now that I'm married, I don't have to deal with being in that uncomfortable space as much. Notice I didn't say anymore. I have had guys still approach me (ring, baby, and all), but it doesn't compare to what I used to go through while at the mall, walking down the street, anywhere. And, funny enough, it's now after I'm married that I can think of some strong and effective retorts.
So, to the young women who find yourselves speechless or unsure of how to get a guy to leave you alone without putting yourself in danger, here is a growing list of ideas:
1) If he is ridiculously younger than you, as in the situation I experienced today, the best thing is to really get on his level. i.e. "Excuse me young man, are you talking to me?" Or ask about his grades or how he's doin' in school, for goodness' sake! That'll stop him in his tracks.
2) It's ok to show your astonishment. "Are you serious right now?" with a bewildered look on your face. Hopefully, he'll realize your shock and back off.
3) Say emphatically: "Hallelujah, praise the Lord, how you doin' brother" while saluting him with the stiff hand wave.
4) Immediately respond: "Do you know the Lord?"--As suggested by a male friend of mine in college. Helps to cut out the dumb stuff.
5) Turn around as if looking for someone. Then, "Oh, you were talking to me? Because I'm a child of God. [pause, looking very concerned]. But God bless you." I know that doesn't make a whole lot of sense logically, but it's meant to kinda confuse him. If he really wants to know more, or if it rings a bell for him, then at least it may open the door for meaningful conversation, rather than one-sided foolishness.
It has always bothered me how we as young women are often approached by men (young and old) who are trying to "get at" us (or holla, mack, run game, spit, whatever you choose to call it). Then, if we are not interested, we have to be careful about how we respond to their unsolicited propositions or else we become a target.
Often, we want to be nice without just flat out saying "get out of my face." Simply saying you're not interested can result in him yelling about how you "think you too good" or calling you foul names. Offering a polite smile with a "no" can somehow translate to "yes, please keep following me." Ignoring him altogether can turn into a yelling fest you didn't ask for and don't deserve. And don't let him be with a group of his boys. Then, his poor ego is on the line. And so, then, is your safety (emotional or otherwise). I can honestly remember times as a teenager when I've given a guy a fake number just to get him to leave me alone. It's a terrible place to be in--at risk for violation, humiliation and degradation.
Now that I'm married, I don't have to deal with being in that uncomfortable space as much. Notice I didn't say anymore. I have had guys still approach me (ring, baby, and all), but it doesn't compare to what I used to go through while at the mall, walking down the street, anywhere. And, funny enough, it's now after I'm married that I can think of some strong and effective retorts.
So, to the young women who find yourselves speechless or unsure of how to get a guy to leave you alone without putting yourself in danger, here is a growing list of ideas:
1) If he is ridiculously younger than you, as in the situation I experienced today, the best thing is to really get on his level. i.e. "Excuse me young man, are you talking to me?" Or ask about his grades or how he's doin' in school, for goodness' sake! That'll stop him in his tracks.
2) It's ok to show your astonishment. "Are you serious right now?" with a bewildered look on your face. Hopefully, he'll realize your shock and back off.
3) Say emphatically: "Hallelujah, praise the Lord, how you doin' brother" while saluting him with the stiff hand wave.
4) Immediately respond: "Do you know the Lord?"--As suggested by a male friend of mine in college. Helps to cut out the dumb stuff.
5) Turn around as if looking for someone. Then, "Oh, you were talking to me? Because I'm a child of God. [pause, looking very concerned]. But God bless you." I know that doesn't make a whole lot of sense logically, but it's meant to kinda confuse him. If he really wants to know more, or if it rings a bell for him, then at least it may open the door for meaningful conversation, rather than one-sided foolishness.
Friday, February 5, 2010
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
In all, Worship, and Serve.
I'm looking at this scrapbooking blog., and I'm just thinking to myself, This lady has developed a following of over 1500 readers, simply because she took her talent and interest and presented it to the public through a (free) avenue--her blog. She's probably been scrapbooking as a normal thing in her life, and now, because she stepped out there and decided to do something more with it, she's developed a real niche for herself. Something to focus on, something to be proud of, to make her husband see that, yes I've been crafting in my little corner, but look at this--other people care too. 1500+ people. I think that's pretty amazing.
I guess I'm having a little trouble developing the confidence in my hobbies that I would like to have. I would like to be more proud of the ways I spend my time, to not feel like I'm not accomplishing anything. Housework can certainly make you feel like it's not an accomplishment, considering that even though you pour your all into it, it needs to be done yet again within like a week or two. And while I love scrapbooking and papercrafts, it's definitely not bringin in any money, nor is it really reaching other people.
Perhaps there is a way to live out the Kingdom through scrapbooking. The first thing I think of is to invite people over, to use crafts as a medium to build relationships and to talk/share with others. Also, perhaps it can even become a ministry of sorts. I can see it now, "The Way's Scrapbooking Ministry will be meeting this Saturday at noon. Bring your pictures, your albums, and all your scraps for an afternoon of creativity, tea and coffee. Let's create memories together!" I mean, that's how ministry is suposed to work. God has given us talents and gifts so that they may be used for the furthering of His kingdom. I think back to a girl, Jenny, who I studied abroad with in Costa Rica. She worked with some other Christians there as part of a Surfing Ministry. She loved surfing, wanted community, so why not use it to reach others?
The other thing is that while I'm scrapbooking, I worship. Scrapbook pages are a celebration of what God has done in our lives. When I look at pictures and relive memories, I'm able to reflect on how God has blessed me in a way that the rip-and-run pace of life does not accommodate. I'm able to meditate on how He's given me family, love, joy, bountiful blessings that I couldn't even imagine years ago. I'm living the life that He has promised, and I wouldn't have it any other way. So, perhaps through making it a comittment to listen to worship music and offer prayers to God through my creations, scrapbooking will help establish and further the Kingdom in my heart and ultimately allow my gratitude and God's glory to flow through me to others more concretely.
I guess I'm having a little trouble developing the confidence in my hobbies that I would like to have. I would like to be more proud of the ways I spend my time, to not feel like I'm not accomplishing anything. Housework can certainly make you feel like it's not an accomplishment, considering that even though you pour your all into it, it needs to be done yet again within like a week or two. And while I love scrapbooking and papercrafts, it's definitely not bringin in any money, nor is it really reaching other people.
Perhaps there is a way to live out the Kingdom through scrapbooking. The first thing I think of is to invite people over, to use crafts as a medium to build relationships and to talk/share with others. Also, perhaps it can even become a ministry of sorts. I can see it now, "The Way's Scrapbooking Ministry will be meeting this Saturday at noon. Bring your pictures, your albums, and all your scraps for an afternoon of creativity, tea and coffee. Let's create memories together!" I mean, that's how ministry is suposed to work. God has given us talents and gifts so that they may be used for the furthering of His kingdom. I think back to a girl, Jenny, who I studied abroad with in Costa Rica. She worked with some other Christians there as part of a Surfing Ministry. She loved surfing, wanted community, so why not use it to reach others?
The other thing is that while I'm scrapbooking, I worship. Scrapbook pages are a celebration of what God has done in our lives. When I look at pictures and relive memories, I'm able to reflect on how God has blessed me in a way that the rip-and-run pace of life does not accommodate. I'm able to meditate on how He's given me family, love, joy, bountiful blessings that I couldn't even imagine years ago. I'm living the life that He has promised, and I wouldn't have it any other way. So, perhaps through making it a comittment to listen to worship music and offer prayers to God through my creations, scrapbooking will help establish and further the Kingdom in my heart and ultimately allow my gratitude and God's glory to flow through me to others more concretely.
Sunday, December 27, 2009
let it out
"If you have the urge to be creative, then it's imperative that you express it."--a man whose name I do not know.
From the trailer for "Who Does She Think She Is?", a film about women, creativity, family, motherhood, and the various tensions women artists experience.
From the trailer for "Who Does She Think She Is?", a film about women, creativity, family, motherhood, and the various tensions women artists experience.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Crafts Galore
I'm on this really strong craft binge right now. It started with the scrapbooking. Then it was crocheting, (which didn't go too far). Then I got excited about doing a puzzle. But I bought a 1,000 piece one and didn't have the patience to finish it. We did about 100 pieces before I had to go get one of those puzzle mats that let you roll up what you're doing and come back to it when convenient.
Nevertheless, here lately, with the holiday season, my creative spark has reignited. As a result, I embarked on a dazzling array of projects: front door wreath, garlands, 50+ christmas cards, handmade Christmas gifts for our neighbors, complete with intricately handmade tags, and photo frame gifts. It's very exciting.
I've always had an affinity for crafting. I've tried my hand at a number of activities throughout the years: latch hook rugs, sewing with Grandma, origami (on a very amateur level), painting picture frames, a teensy dab of cross-stitching, and, of course, some painting (watercolor, mostly).
But the cool thing is, now I've got the freedom and resources to actually build on my crafty inclinations. With working part-time, having a daughter, trying to save money (on gifts, home decor, and the rest), and trying to be as resourceful as possible by reusing what we already have, crafting comes as a natural hobby worth loving. During the Black Friday sales, I was able to snag a nifty $99 craft cart for about 30 bucks. Complete with drawers and about 20 compartments for all my pens & little embellishments, it's a dream come true. It even has little ribbon spindles on the side!
So with that, I'm in the process of reorganizing our kitchen to accommodate these little treasures. While doing so, I posted on my fb that I was looking for organization supplies. One fb friend responds, "The Container Store is great!" Ha! Container Store my foot! The stuff they sell is priced at least 3x what it's probably worth. More like Ikea's $2 magazine holders. That's my kind of deal. I really love how it's all coming together. Slowly, but surely!
It's funny how I'm able to come up with craft ideas and inspiration even without cable TV or spending lots of money on books. Between At Home with Lisa Quinn, which comes on LiveWellHD channel 7-2 (thanks, DTV!), She's Crafty, which comes on some obscure dtv channel but I guess is aired in Canada, and of course, the big mamma jamma--the internet, complete with YouTube and a host of great idea sites, I've got all I need to be on a creative roll! I've been soaking up sites like:
http://www.designspongeonline.com wonderful craft projects, modern, easy-to-follow directions, clear pictures. The site authors are funny, speak to the audience directly, so I've grown "familiar" with this site.
http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/ inspiration for home decor, diy projects. Some ideas are a little too avant garde for me, but I still like browsing the posts and pics.
http://photojojo.com/ I recently discovered this site (thnks to lisa quinn), but I've already fallen in love with it. Hands down the best photo projects I've ever seen. Nifty tools and ideas that reveal the creators' creativity. Love, love the ideas, the pictures, the uniqueness of the projects they've posted. Just all-around cool.
Finally, I just want to say Thank You, Lord, for bringing me this far. I remember when I didn't even have a place to keep any of my belongings. I also remember the precious times I got to share with Grandma while I was a child & pre-teen. We'd take countless trips to Hancock Fabrics and the other craft store nearby it. She'd let me pick out which patterns I wanted to work on: mostly shorts, simple skirts and a couple times, some really hard dresses that I'd need serious help from her on. She'd also continuously support my decisions to try something new. Even if it was something she'd never worked with before and that she didn't know if I'd actually follow-through with, she still bought me the supplies and gave me the space to create. I am eternally grateful for that. I believe that's what gave me the confidence to pick this back up now, with hopes of making things that show thoughtfulness, love and effort.
It is my prayer that Grandma's very best would continue to live on through me and the things I create. It is also my prayer that Sarai (and subsequent children) would love crafts, emanate creativity, and embrace projects with passion and humble gratitude. I hope that my family will look forward to creating things together and see arts and crafts as an opportunity to discover and share their hearts and selves with others. I'm thankful that the times of lack I've experienced have birthed within me the qualities of resourcefulness, gratitude, and a strong resolve to make the most of what I have. Thank you, Jesus. Amen.
Nevertheless, here lately, with the holiday season, my creative spark has reignited. As a result, I embarked on a dazzling array of projects: front door wreath, garlands, 50+ christmas cards, handmade Christmas gifts for our neighbors, complete with intricately handmade tags, and photo frame gifts. It's very exciting.
I've always had an affinity for crafting. I've tried my hand at a number of activities throughout the years: latch hook rugs, sewing with Grandma, origami (on a very amateur level), painting picture frames, a teensy dab of cross-stitching, and, of course, some painting (watercolor, mostly).
But the cool thing is, now I've got the freedom and resources to actually build on my crafty inclinations. With working part-time, having a daughter, trying to save money (on gifts, home decor, and the rest), and trying to be as resourceful as possible by reusing what we already have, crafting comes as a natural hobby worth loving. During the Black Friday sales, I was able to snag a nifty $99 craft cart for about 30 bucks. Complete with drawers and about 20 compartments for all my pens & little embellishments, it's a dream come true. It even has little ribbon spindles on the side!
So with that, I'm in the process of reorganizing our kitchen to accommodate these little treasures. While doing so, I posted on my fb that I was looking for organization supplies. One fb friend responds, "The Container Store is great!" Ha! Container Store my foot! The stuff they sell is priced at least 3x what it's probably worth. More like Ikea's $2 magazine holders. That's my kind of deal. I really love how it's all coming together. Slowly, but surely!
It's funny how I'm able to come up with craft ideas and inspiration even without cable TV or spending lots of money on books. Between At Home with Lisa Quinn, which comes on LiveWellHD channel 7-2 (thanks, DTV!), She's Crafty, which comes on some obscure dtv channel but I guess is aired in Canada, and of course, the big mamma jamma--the internet, complete with YouTube and a host of great idea sites, I've got all I need to be on a creative roll! I've been soaking up sites like:
http://www.designspongeonline.com wonderful craft projects, modern, easy-to-follow directions, clear pictures. The site authors are funny, speak to the audience directly, so I've grown "familiar" with this site.
http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/ inspiration for home decor, diy projects. Some ideas are a little too avant garde for me, but I still like browsing the posts and pics.
http://photojojo.com/ I recently discovered this site (thnks to lisa quinn), but I've already fallen in love with it. Hands down the best photo projects I've ever seen. Nifty tools and ideas that reveal the creators' creativity. Love, love the ideas, the pictures, the uniqueness of the projects they've posted. Just all-around cool.
Finally, I just want to say Thank You, Lord, for bringing me this far. I remember when I didn't even have a place to keep any of my belongings. I also remember the precious times I got to share with Grandma while I was a child & pre-teen. We'd take countless trips to Hancock Fabrics and the other craft store nearby it. She'd let me pick out which patterns I wanted to work on: mostly shorts, simple skirts and a couple times, some really hard dresses that I'd need serious help from her on. She'd also continuously support my decisions to try something new. Even if it was something she'd never worked with before and that she didn't know if I'd actually follow-through with, she still bought me the supplies and gave me the space to create. I am eternally grateful for that. I believe that's what gave me the confidence to pick this back up now, with hopes of making things that show thoughtfulness, love and effort.
It is my prayer that Grandma's very best would continue to live on through me and the things I create. It is also my prayer that Sarai (and subsequent children) would love crafts, emanate creativity, and embrace projects with passion and humble gratitude. I hope that my family will look forward to creating things together and see arts and crafts as an opportunity to discover and share their hearts and selves with others. I'm thankful that the times of lack I've experienced have birthed within me the qualities of resourcefulness, gratitude, and a strong resolve to make the most of what I have. Thank you, Jesus. Amen.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
ineffable
my writing never seems to be able to capture
the entirety of the moment.
either i leave out the setting
the impetus for writing
the related thoughts that came before
the intensity of the moment OR
the tangents that tantalize en route
something is always,
and will always be,
missing
the entirety of the moment.
either i leave out the setting
the impetus for writing
the related thoughts that came before
the intensity of the moment OR
the tangents that tantalize en route
something is always,
and will always be,
missing
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